Tuesday, September 12, 2006
Graduation Blues
Yes, I haven't got my internet cable up and running. I never seem to have any luck with these internet orders. Somehow, somewhere ... there will be a problem that causes the ultimate delay of internet usage. Gah.Once again, I'm back on campus for the fourth and last academic year. I feel sad, really. As much as I want to burn all the stressful assignments and projects away, I like being a student. In all my schooling years, I must say I enjoy varsity student life the most. High school was insignificant because I never had any real friends to start with. My whereabouts and doings were controlled by my parents in the most effective way ever. I hardly get to enjoy activities other than "studying". Mind you, studying was just about getting that gleaming straight A's. Yes, I know it is important to get those grades but the learning environment was not appropriate.
I love studying here. I have to say that I am really grateful to be given this rare opportunity to pursue my education in Canada. This may sound silly but I'm holding back on reality - I don't want to graduate so soon! *boohoo*
Oh well, it is only a temporary emotional state that lingers. Soon, I will have to accept it and move on. If I really don't want to go out to work, I guess I'll just pursue a Masters' degree then. Then again, getting a job is tempting. The money is the key. No money, no fun and hence no life. How predictable.
Everything is getting tougher. Expectations are way higher. I enter the class on the first day of school, and the professor just highlights the design projects that we are responsible for. They actually scare you on the first day of classes:
"This is probably going to be the most difficult course you will ever take."
Yeah, thanks for the info, doc. I'm probably going to be the most annoying, dumb student you will ever deal with, ho ho ho! ^^
Believe it or not, they think that engineering students are incapable of speaking in public. That's why I have to take this scary public-speaking course, a requirement for all graduating fourth years. Argh. And you would think that they don't have any more of these 2-minute impromptu speeches in university. I was expecting more learning experience on presentation skills. But no.... I have a 2-minute impromptu talk to give on Thursday. Damn.
Moving on with life, prospective employees like me have to now join the hunt for a job. Resume writing, cover letters, career fairs, conferences, talk sessions by big companies and so forth ...
It is stressful.
That is still the easy part. I hope I still have enough hair on my head by the time interviews come up in my schedule. Or perhaps there wouldn't even be one interview session for me :(
It is all worrying. But I guess life goes on. Suddenly growing up seems so threatening. When I was 16, I wanted to grow up so fast. Now, I question the integrity of that thought. It's fun to grow up and gain that freedom in your new adult life but with this comes more responsibility, and less fun.
Sigh. Maybe I should have gone into culinery school. Sometimes, I don't even know if I enjoy what I am studying right now.
